I remember that wretched night
When in darkness, bitterly, I cried
& at my despair, my demons smiled
That helpless night…. I had a knife.
I questioned my existence’s purpose
As I felt like a hopeless clown in a circus.
Corrupted by the problems of my life
That helpless night…. I had a knife.
With tears streaming from my eyes
On my nerve, I placed the knife.
Like a bee yearns nectar, from a bud
The knife yearned the taste of my blood.
I had a dark desire to use the knife
But flashed before me my mother’s eyes.
I slowly realized, my life could impact other lives
& this decimated the seduction of the knife.
I understood the value of my life
As amidst the pain, I learnt to smile.
For others, I decided to rise
That night….. I threw away the knife.
Note: From the depths of darkness & depression, our life gets plagued by negative thoughts. I admit I too had suicidal thoughts few years ago. So this poem is a slight peek into my past & also hopes to serve as a message to anyone who might be going through a similar traumatic struggle. To me every life counts, no matter how depressing the situation might be always remember that your mere existence is the reason as to why someone smiles. So why indulge in an act that replaces, that “someone’s” smile with tears of despair? The knife in this poem is not just an entity but the very embodiment of suicidal thoughts that corrupt & stab the very soul of a depressed person. I urge all my readers to be understanding & compassionate towards the troubles that anyone around them faces. Please show the troubled souls that you care, so that none ever picks up a knife due to depression & helplessness.
If you liked this post, then I humbly request you to please follow me on Instagram: gentleman.is.quiet
Beautiful. I think many of us have struggled with similar thoughts. I’m glad your mother’s eyes saved you.
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Yes just tried to express the fact that every life does count & that even if we feel that our existence is a worthless struggle we still must understand that certain lives depend on our existence. If not for ourselves then atleast for those lives we mustn’t give up, thanks for your readership and valuable feedback β€οΈ
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Wow! I can’t tell you how much I like it. The way you have expressed each and every emotion. Even I have been through this phase so I can easily connect with it. Keep up the good work π
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Thanks for taking out time to go through my poem, I’m glad you could relate to it. I’m sorry that in the past you had to go through such kind of phase I’m glad you emerged out of it, but if at all you ever are haunted by any such negative feelings then please feel free to reach out to me. I’d be happy to lend you moral support βΊοΈ thanks for such a heart warming feedback
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Very well written. The poem entails a very strong message. You have written it in a very simplistic fashion and it is understandable to the readers. Very good!
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Thanks for decorating my post with such a lovely comment π
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Pleasure has been all mine. π
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This is simply beautiful and so deep! Every life, every smile counts!
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I’m grateful to you for your readership & valuable thought , I couldn’t have agreed more with you regarding the fact that every life is priceless in it’s own respective way π
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Pleasure was all mine…your posts are truly mesmerizing! I gave it a follow, too!π
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Thanks for following I look forward to going through your posts in the near future as well , stay in touch Meher for the generosity of your words certainly made my heart swell with joy π
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Only one word- WOW π
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Thanks for your generous feedback π
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I’m sure most of us have been there. I love the description. Well written.
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Yes we all stumble & fall, haunted by a feeling of loneliness & despair in life, but what matters is how we intend to crawl back up are that fall. What matters is how we seek wisdom from our misery, thanks taking out time to share such lovely feedback π
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So true. My pleasure!
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Wow! So glad to read this eloquent piece conveying such a significant message! π
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Thanks for your readership I’m glad you liked this poem, thanks for expressing such positive feedback π
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Beautiful! Your posts are very thought provoking and engaging.
I’m eager to read the next line and specially your notes at the bottom.
Very well written
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Yes I feel that the note at the end of my writings is a way through which my readers can understand and relate to my thought behind my poems thanks for decorating my blog with your sweet words π
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Pleasure!
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I love your blog!!! Very moving and motivational.. thank you for sharing!!
Lots of love
Judy
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Thanks for the love and support, it’s the goodness of my readers like you that inspires me to write π
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Powerful stuff here. Love your intense comparisons throughout the piece. Hurt my heart to read this, just as all good poetry should
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Thanks for your readership. This is a dark poem that talks about my depressing past but I’m humbled by the way you decorated this post with such a positive feedback π
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Absolutely beautiful. Thank you for this post. Itβs so hard to drag yourself out of the depths of despair and people who are depressed one way or another do it daily.
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I agree with you, & the fact that I personally dived into the very depths of depression and darkness due to the various events in my life made me understand the true essence of the emotional struggle that had enveloped me. So just thought of writing this poem for anyone who would be going through a similar psychological struggle. π
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I must say it is a spectacular piece of art. The words resonate with the heart at a deep, under-the-surface level. I am glad you found the immense courage required to βthrow away the knifeβ. Thank you for sharing. π
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Yes that was the motivate of the poem that not only exhibiting that something good be created while going through a depressing phase in life but also the fact that everyone should value their existence as other lives are impacted by our own existence. So I hope that someone who is going through a similar psychological struggle too values their lives and “throws away the knife”. Thanks Michelle for expressing such heart warming thoughts, I’m indebted to your kindness really ππ
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Wow, absolutely gripping. I resonate so deeply with this poem. It’s an outstanding piece.
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Thanks for your readership and support truly thankful for such a pleasing response to one of my darkest writings, guess if the emotions engraved in a poem are true then even a depressing entity can be made to appear as something good π truly humbled by your generosity π
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Wonderful message. Really resonated with me as well, and that is what good poetry is meant to do. π
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I’m delighted that you could connect & relate with one of the most darkest moments of my life & were still able to find something in it π
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I love this! It’s so powerful,
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I’m delighted that you took out time to go through this poem, I was insanely depressed in that phase of my life, but just happy that I was able to portray my tears of the past that they instill hope & gives a powerful message to others. Thanks a ton for your kind words π
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Really nice.
do check my blog too. though i have just started, i aspire to write like you π
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Thanks for such a pleasing comment, I’ll surely check out your blog ππ
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Heart-rending!
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Delighted that this dark post could manifest a thought that could touch hearts thanks for reading π
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My pleasure.
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Wow *_*
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Thanks for your readership I’m glad you liked the poem π
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I love this. I was a self harmer. I’ve stopped now. Harming and giving more pain to our body isn’t gonna take us anywhere.
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I’m sorry to know that you had a troubled past but you should be proud of the way you overcame that. Please never every harm yourself again & try to extend a helping hand to anyone going through a similar emotional struggle. May you always smile as big as river Nile β€
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Achingly tormented in its beauty. Like a moonlight casting in the darkness. I, too, have struggled with depression and its silent movement and by the time you see it, it is too late and the fight begins. Thank you for the post.
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Wonderfully written. Very inspiring
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Thank you this poem is quite close to me on an emotional level. I’m glad you liked this poem π
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This is amazing, itβs beautiful.
You got me emotional, great workβ€οΈ
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I’m glad my words could connect with you that way π
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Do not want to say much, its only that i can relate a lot it { not me but.. yeah!}. Totally amazing what you wrote!!
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Thank you I’m glad you could relate to my words π
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This is amazing! Painful but very good message πβ₯οΈ
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Thanks for the lovely feedback π
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Great share..
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Thank you for your readership and support ππ
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Painful but very powerful post. I loved it very much ππππ
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Thanks I’m glad you loved it βΊοΈ
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This is soo good. You wrote beautifully and portrayed the painful past and present anyone might be facing. It’s just too good. βΊοΈ
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Thank you I’m delighted to know that you feel that way about this anyone. Yes every pain/hardship has a purpose. Perhaps the purpose for that past experience of mine was to create something to motivate others who might be going through a similar struggle.
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Agreed!!
It’s my pleasure ππ
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Heartfelt.
But very courageous of you to throw away that knife, really.
And It’s really a brilliant piece of writing Sidharth.π
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Thank you Shivani, I’m truly humbled by the kindness of your words πβΊοΈ
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This one reflected my feelings I always have.. Something past me.. I found interesting that you use a lot of rhyming words.. I am not upto literature, but still felt like saying! π
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I’m glad to know the feeling is past you now. It’s quite a torturous feeling, isn’t it?
Yes, I love to rhyme words and verses. I feel by rhyming the verses I can connect with my readers a lot better, it improves the overall flow of my emotions and thoughts. Hence, my blog is named writingrhymes as well lol. π
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Oh! I didn’t noticed connection between the name ‘writingrhymes’ and your poetic phrases.. Wonderful! Kudos π
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Thank you, I’m glad you liked the connection. π
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Heartwrenching. I think if you are a sensitive soul, we all come to the point, where we question our existence, or much more, we doubt it. To persevere is hard, but maybe it’s by persevering that we find our call.
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Yes sometimes our doubts need to die a little, so that a hope is reborn. Thank you for sharing such a heartfelt feedback. π
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Hard to believe such a gentle soul as you are had contemplated such a thing πͺ
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Some hardships build character so that’s alright. π
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Amazing poem. Superb.π I think at some point in most people’s lives we’ve all considered the notion of suicide. You know something? I’m glad you didn’t do it. π
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Beautifully and authentically written, Sidharth! This poem is meaningful to me because someone close to me has gone through similar struggles, and has made a lot of progress.
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Glad to know that this poem was reach out to you emotionally in some way. Please do give my warm regards to that person who might be going through a similar struggle. Please give that person a hug on my behalf & tell him/her that their life does matter β€
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Thank you. I think all is fairly stable for the time being. It’s always a struggle for him. Your kind wishes are appreciated.
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Glad to know that things are stable. Based on my personal experience, all I can say that it’s at such stable juncture when they should be showed the true value of life by embracing them with love and understanding. Im sure that you’ll be taking great care of him, hope you and that person always smile as big as river Nile β€οΈ
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